Lost again
ahahahahahah I just ate so much bread. I'll be surprised if I still fit my formal dress when it arrives :L Hmmm Stimulus of time travel eh? Okay lemme think.....for a while :L I suck at making interesting stories, my plot lines are always so lame ;_;
I remember I used to write stories just for fun and now I don't even do that anymore. I'm not working as hard as I used to, not putting as much effort as I used to... in grade seven. I think I started losing myself in high school. But anyway, when I'm in the mood, I'll write the story. But for now, I'll just put up a story I wrote on my first english lesson of grade nine (It's is about forests YET again). I tried to replicate this story from the one I wrote in grade seven which got me the essay award but I couldn't :s I think my ability to write deteriorates as I get older. I found this story in a folder just then o_o filled with a bunch of other stuff. Btw, Just a warning, it has no plot LOL. Nothing exciting happening except for a kid getting lost and then getting found (:" I'm reminiscing again. I haven't done that for a looooong time.
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Lost
Emerging out of the thickly grown trees, a lone black-haired girl stood hesitantly at the overgrown footpath. Brushing back a strand of raven coloured hair, Laura fumbled with the rusty latch of her firewood basket. Balancing the basket on one knee, she reached inside, fumbling around for the thin gold trinket her recently deceased mother had left for her. Bristles stuck into her as as she groped for the trinket. After a few minutes of feeling nothing, she began emptying the basket. Her fingers stung as the small bits of wood dug deep into her pale flesh. Laura, kneeling down, reached her hand inside; and felt nothing. Feeling a rising panic coming up her throat, she forced herself to calm down. 'I must have left it inside the forest when I was collecting firewood!' Laura thought suddenly. Straightening up, she darted into the dense looming forest once again.
Pelting through the dense undergrowth, Laura's eyes darted around her surroundings frantically, her mind filled with anxiety. Nearing a round clearing of trees, she slowed down and walked purposefully toward the centre, where a tree stump was pierced with an axe. Suddenly a golden glint caught her eye, a thin gold thread hung dangling on a small branch of a sapling. A breath of relief escaped her lips as she bounded over and gingerly slipped the trinket off the branch and dropped it into a worn pocket in her dress. Overcome with relief, with birds chirping in the warm weather, Laura's eyes closed as she drifted into a comfortable sleep, a happy smile on her face.
Waking up in the cold darkness, Laura was afraid. The sun had set, leaving an unfriendly sort of gloom settled over the clearing. With her heart thumping like a drum, she sat up, her heart sinking. The dark trees loomed menacingly over her small figure, the thin branches were ferocious claws reaching out. Cold wind tore at her hair as Laura curled up, sobbing relentlessly in fear. Waif-like shadows danced eerily around her as the thin rays of pale moonlight shone through the ragged, ghostly clouds. Hungry and tired, Laura was horrified when a golden light pierced through the inky darkness. Without giving a thought, she jumped up warily, her thin shoulder frame shaking uncontrollably.
Footsteps swished about as the light got closer and closer. Ice gripped her heart as she tried fruitlessly to swallow the wave of fear that was threatening to engulf her. Suddenly, a tall dark figure emerged out of the trees. Immediately, all her fear and hunger were washed away. Tears of joy rolled down Laura's cheeks. In a golden bliss, she ran joyously toward the strongly built figure with her arms stretched out. Burying her face in the soft fabric of her father's brown coat, she sobbed with relief, the sobs tearing unintentionally through her lips. "It's okay now Laura, you're safe," her father's voice assured gently, his strong, warm hands on the back of her head. Both figures stood there, with the warm light of the torch shining toward the trees, wrapped in a moment of utter content and tranquil joy.
Here are Ms Tavio's comments (she set this as a 40min activity on our first lesson o_o):
Well done! An excellent use of descriptive language. Tension is successfully built and sustained. You have a tendency to run sentences together. Also, thought he descriptions are inventive, the plot of the story is hard to follow. The reader is left to fill in too many gaps about what is happening.
I agree. Damn I kind of want to re-read the one I wrote which got me into state high :L even thought it's some lame story about bikes o_o Okay after I graduate perhaps I'll start writing again :3 Turn this blog into a short story database. Just kidding. Pft. After I learn how to create a interesting plot someday. Anyway... gonna go ban some sites I procrastinate on (ahem youtube, blog). Ah I have so much random crap I feel like typing. But no, UMAT & STUDY TIME!
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