I guess its goodbye then

by - 5:38 PM



Hello guys :)



On saturday i went to chinese school as per usual, its getting pretty boring cause so many people left my class :'( we were so awesome. But yeah, we keep getting sub teachers and now we've finally got this random male teacher who talks about random stuff during class & like i barely learn anything, chinese school is so bludge cause the things he is teaching is pretty easy. Meh, anyways spent the break times grilling julie about ;) hohoho. Afterwards mum picked me&bro up and we had lunch at market square, had beef noodles 8) and bought a whole load of yummy asian food. My mum is so unusually generous when my dad is overseas haha, just a observation.



Baked cookies on saturday because i was extremely bored, probably just putting off chem but yeah. Wanted to bake a pretty cake except i didn't have any ingredients at home so i was stuck with boring old cookies. They didn't turn out really delicious, i always seem to get sick of stuff i cook ._.


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Okay now with the downside of things - as always.
On the same day i opened the cupboard and accidently smashed a glass jar on the floor and later on i was lucky enough that i knocked a spice jar out of the cupboard and it fell on my little toe. Now i've got a massive purple bruise on my toe because i saved the stupid spice jar accidently.



My foot looks so much better in the picture, at least you guys are spared the grossness of the purple bruise on my toe, well most of it anyway.


Words cannot describe how much i hate myself right now, seriously. So frustrated. I am always procastinating, complaining, relying on others. I promised myself i would work hard and i'm slowly slacking off even more each day. I tell myself i will try look pretty for semi and here i am eating snacks. I tell myself I'll get good marks and work hard and i'm watching masterchef and cramming chemistry. I tell myself i'll exercise more to grow taller, i quit cross country. Argh this is so pathetic. I feel so drained and mentally tired all the time, i'm sick of school, sick of everything and its not even grade 12. I tell myself i need to be positive but it seems like OP1 is slipping even further away.


Social life literally sucks at the moment sometimes and like i'm not even looking foward to the two main events of the year - semi & japan trip as they seem to have taken the down side of things too.


1. heaps of people aren't going semi & apparently the venue is crap


2. We can't go to Tokyo for Japan trip because of the earthquakes and instead we get a few days less of the trip & the teachers are inviting grade 10's even though they promised us last year it'd only be grade elevens.


I wasn't originally gonna go type up this pity story//complaint post but you know, i'm so stressed right now its not even funny, i feel angry, pissed, frustrated, hopeless all in one and its probably all because of chem. I just typed a whole paragraph of crap for my draft which is due tommorrow. Seriously, thats crap ):


And, today i found out that my Aunty passed away this morning ): It was really unexpected i guess, i thought she had a few more weeks. I'm sorry i couldn't be there to see you, even though we're not close, thankyou for everything.


Oh and cindy got me to write a song a few days ago but i couldn't be bothered finishing it - there is no point. I have no talent in songwriting, i'll just leave that to cindy :)


Shooting Star


I see a star shooting across the dark night sky


it's like a sign telling me to say goodbye


All those memories of being with you


Is throwing them away what i'm supposed to do?



Cause baby you're my shooting star


Lighting up the dark night sky


I feel myself falling without asking why



Goodnight.

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